Instead my head is racing, flitting from this to that. The list of things I need or want to do.
Sometimes I wish my life was more simple. I wonder what it would be like to have a tidy home? A routine and 9-5 job where you leave on time and have just a short journey to and from. An organised craft space where I could just go to when I want to create. Instead... my head buzzes with ideas and tasks. It feels relentless lately. My home and creative space reflect that - there is a mess everywhere I look.
I take stock. The sun is shining as I sit here at the computer. Before this, I sat with one of my journals, a list book where I try to organise my mind and my day. It usually works well. Sometimes I set times for tasks, leave them unfinished when the allocated time is up. Move on. Make headway. My heart is still beating faster than usual. Adrenalin. I know today is just 'one day' and there is much I want to achieve. Ironing, car insurance to sort, making kits for a book making class I am teaching in 2 weeks . I immediately think of my cabin. This weekend I achieved a lot. Even more than I imagined I could. But it is left unfinished. Time ran out and inside the door there is disarray. I smile. There is a familiarity....
I look around my computer. Clear the other day... part of my sweep of paper and clutter. Some of it lies on the floor in another room, waiting to be filed or organised. I sigh, then catch myself. I remember the recycling sack, bulging with paper and so heavy I have to drag it rather than lift. I need to take some out and start a second bag. A reminder of my achievement. There will be more paper... lots more paper to throw. Enough to fill the second bag if I am focused today.
My mind flits from one thing to the other. A phone call I must make to a friend. She is on a 6 weeks stay in UK and returns to Australia next week. Her schedule is as tight as my own. We plan a second meeting this Saturday. I am excited, feel myself breaking into a smile when I think about seeing her. Soul mates separated by too many miles. Melanie has also discovered a love of creativity and we share ideas and photos of our work. I am sad we can not have play days, sit at a table together. Another sigh... again I catch myself... remember the internet. How this brings us together and fills the gap. I think that I must experiment with Skype. It is downloaded but I have never tried it. The thought of spending more time learning how to do something is daunting. But sometimes, I remind myself, it is in a good cause and I know I will be so glad of it.
I think back again to my list. My heart is beating calmer now. I look around my desk top. It is nothing I can't cope with, small steps I tell myself. The computer is buzzing. I don't like the noise but I can shut it off when I am absorbed. I wish I could go for a walk down the river. I picture the water sparkling in the sun. It is the perfect day for being outdoors, but today, I need to be firm with myself. There are things to be done. I need treats to keep my motivation going. A cup of special tea. Rose, I think. I imagine the hot filled mug next to me, the steam lifting a scented fragrance. It inspires me to leave the computer. The back of the house is in shade this time of day. I prefer the front at this hour where the sun streams through and lifts my spirits. But there are things to be done..........
To read other moments or add your own, do visit. And thank you for popping by today.
Please note:
I like to add a photo with my post but today I am keeping things simple so that I can do more.
But I have photos to share very soon...